Letting Jesus down on Easter

Last week was Easter week. I started off strong with a reading plan on the Bible app to focus my attention on the historical events of Easter week that I celebrate at a follower of Jesus. By day three of the nine day plan, I was already two days behind... a promising prognostic. Here in Colombia, there are plenty of distractions to keep one busy during "Semana Santa" in addition to the normal distractions of life. I got caught up in a whirlwind of unexpected events and barely observed any traditions of the holiday.

By Easter Sunday, I woke up groggy and immediately grabbed my phone to check on some updates on things that were happening in my life. After about two minutes I remembered it was Easter Sunday, the most important day of the season to celebrate the resurrection of Jesus. Unfortunately, the whirlwind of the week had distracted me from focusing on celebrating and remembering the holiday in its traditional sense. There I was, looking in the mirror disappointed in myself, feeling guilty and like I was letting Jesus down on Easter.

I thought in some way I had disrespected or not valued Jesus by not having read a plan or prayed certain prayers during the week. I had instead bothered him all week with my tears and complaints and confusion during my whirlwind. Feeling somewhat ashamed, I teared up and asked Jesus to forgive me for making this week about me.

I know this might seem crazy but immediately a strange thought popped into my head that said "that is what I died for", in the sense that Jesus died and resurrected so that I could have a real and raw relationship with him.

I share this strange interaction because I believe in my pursuit of trying to do things right, follow tradition, even be a "good Christian", I can often forget what Jesus really came for. He didn't come to earth to live and die just so I could remember and celebrate what he did once a year. He came to set me and you free to live in purpose, to walk with us and be present in the daily things we face, even the difficult and inconvenient moments. I think maybe, far from being let down, he delights in simply walking with us in all of life, to be present with us and to be invited into all of it, not just the "good" stuff.

Keeping it real, I wonder, if Jesus came and died for so much more than we limit ourselves to believe sometimes. I wonder, if Jesus wants to give us a fresh perspective of what it looks like to have a relationship with him in 2026, with all our distractions and messes and chaos. I wonder how much would change simply by knowing he is present and loving, even in the mess...